Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Another TIP TALL TALE from Work

Cow-Orker (unsolicited): I always use names of my pets or lady friends for my passwords at work.

TIP (I see...whaddaya fishing for here, pal?): Hmm. I always go with the names of the Superheroes I created as a kid.

Cow-Orker: Like?

TIP: Well, I'm not one to share this kind of info but, since I don't use these particular ones anymore, Hamboy and Porklad.

Cow-Orker (slightly taken aback bacon): These...these were characters you created?

TIP: I was inspired by my dad's years working the killing floor at Hormel.

Cow-Orker: Ohhh.

Labels: , ,

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Godzilla Pants: Now more than Ever


Labels: ,

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Alleged Superheroes


Labels: , ,

Sentient Breakfast



Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Faux-Full-Body-Pelt Skedaddle



Monday, March 07, 2011

Today's Film Inspired Prevaricaton du Jour

Flipping through the channels the other night I stumbled upon a scene of some older gentlemen dropping a suitcase and a bunch of sausages/weiners tumbling out of it.

Well, how could I not stop and see what this film was all about?

So I did and quickly recognized it as 1984's THE KILLING FIELDS. Having not seen it in years I stuck it out.

Flash forward to Monday morning at work.

Thanks to to accidental encounter with the image of some fellow dropping his weiner-filled suitcase I was entirely prepared to answer the typical Cow-Orker Question of How was your Weekend.

Here's how it went down:

Cow-Orker: Did you have a good weekend?

TIP: Yep. I caught a really cool movie on Saturday Night when I was flipping through the channels. Some dude dropped his suitcase and a bunch of weiners fell out of it. That was enough for me to stick with it to the end.

Cow-Orker: What was the movie called?

TIP: The Killing Fields.

Cow-Orker: What was it about?

TIP (Woo Hoo!): Cambodia's Sausage Industry under the Khmer Rouge. The Khmer Rouge were like our USDA.

Cow-Orker: Why was it called The Killing Fields?

TIP: Oh, right! See, the Khmer Rouge liked to make their weiners outside instead of in Sausage Factories or whatever. Quite controversial for its time.

Cow-Orker: That makes sense.

TIP: And that Lead Lawyer dude from the original Law and Order was in it. He was bearded and ran a Hot Dog Cart with his Cambodian buddy. Surprisingly touching film.

Cow-Orker: I'm going to check it out! Sounds...weird.

TIP: Yes. But worth it. Let me know when you see it.

Cow-Orker: OK.

I enjoyed this encounter (and fib) so much that it inspired a doodle.

Sunday, March 06, 2011

Late Corpulent Actors with Swords

Mama Cass

Not an Actor per se but she did appear as herself in the Scooby Doo episode THE HAUNTED CANDY FACTORY

Labels: , ,

Saturday, March 05, 2011

Bread Jesus


Labels: ,

Late Corpulent Actors with Swords

Jackie Gleason


Labels: , ,

Friday, March 04, 2011

Marvel Comics Presents

Michael Landon in a Bear Suit had met Lou Ferrigno?


Labels: , , ,

Thursday, March 03, 2011

The Birth of an Alias: Misheard Department

Setting: Near the Work Coffee Station

Cow-Orker #1: My husband and I are getting a new mattress.

Cow-Orker #2: My husband and I did that recently.

(who happens to saunter on through at this very moment?)

TIP: Same! My wife and I's old mattress started looking like a slightly ajar burrito.

Cow-Orker #1: A jarred burrito?

TIP (HAHA!!!): New from Hormel. I spilled it on our mattress. Can't really say why I had a bottle of burrito in bed with me though...

(looks around...walks away)


Slightly Ajar Burrtio -> Jarred Burrito -> Jared Burrtio.

Labels: , ,

Wednesday, March 02, 2011

Late Corpulent Actors with Swords

Some quick sketches for a possible series

Raymond Burr with an Épée

Orson Welles with Excalibur-pierced Pig

Labels: , , , ,

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

Overheard in line at the Gas Station Yesterday:

One Fellow (whispering...and clearly not effectively since I can report this): I accidentally took my Wife's Lady Pill yesterday.

Other Fellow: Oh, shit, man!

TIP (jumps in with a sympathetic tone): Oh. My. GOD! That happened to my eldest son! He took to wearing....decorative scarves. We had to have his stomach pumped!

First Fellow: Get out of here!

TIP: Will do! (leaves)