What your Nickname tells me

Scrum-Dilly-icious:
Your own natural flavor is enhanced whilst in a hogpile.

Pulse-Pants:
A innate preference for Inhumanly/Erotically tight trousers that broadcast your blood pressure from twenty feet away.

The Pissing Link:
You've successfully closed the gap betwixt Man and Pre-Man urinary evolution.

Pork-Nips:
Three, Four, Five and Six superfluous nipples hide beneath your shirt and I'd also imagine your tendency to lie prone for 'suckling time.'

Twinkie:
You're bound to have an elongated 'shelf-life' and suffer from what can best be described as a 'cream-filled thorax.'

T