Tuesday, July 25, 2006

On the Road with the Foghat cover band BRUMECHAPEAU
An excerpt from their Daily Log

Day 37

"Slow Ride, my ass...almost NO RIDE. We pulled into town (the next on our tour's itinerary) with enough fumes left in the van's tank to make a gas huffer (or even bassist, Nedly) think twice before inserting his/her questing proboscis under the Gas Cap. Hell, let's be honest here; it wasn't so much a Gas Cap as it was the slagged remnants of a Elvisian TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS Replica Belt Buckle which had found itself rendered down to its current state during an unexpected pyrotechnic display (but nothing like Great White's disastrous Rhode Island gig) between sets at Manna Tee's Bar and Grille. Oh, wait...I said I'd be honest here. It wasn't so much an 'unexpected pyrotechnic display' as it was a small fire in Fugue Lou's pants pocket. The Tequila tranfusion he had underwent pre/during/post show had 'advised' him to 'cut out the middle man' by bypassing the readily available ashtrays and stubbing out his American Spirits in the aforementioned pocket. The eventual combustion of his threadbare Rustler's (sodden as they were with--duh--Booze) proved fiery enough to melt his highly regarded decorative beltbuckle. Fortunately, he was not actually IN his pants when the fire broke out; they had been promptly ditched when Nature (actually, Tequila Piss) came a' calling. It had been deduced by the collective brain skills and Holmes-ish Knack of our three roadies that the former PROPER Gas Cap had liberated itself from our Employ (and, naturally, it's very Reason for Existing) at a late night refueling stop (there is strong evidence that the loss was a by-product of the never-to-be-mentioned-again Ding Dong scuffle that had broken out between Nedly and CymbAlfred). Finding ourselves sans Gas Cap (and brushing off the suggestion to use one of Tour Bandanas as a temporary replacement...where do the guys think most of our profits come from anyway?) we soon noted that the ex-belt buckle was just the right size to stand in for our AWOL inanimate compadre. Talk about something positive coming from a not-so-positive 'freak' accident. We should remember to dedicate our next show to Memphis Lloyd; who knew his gift would do more than simply keep Fugue Lou's britches up AND keep the show on the road?"

T

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