Espied this Morning in the Parking Lot of an area Gas Station/Superette
Middle-aged caucasian gentleman (bristley pate with the slightest sheen of sweat and/or morning dew)
Sleeveless Flannel shirt (appeared to not have been purchased that way...strong possibility that the former sleeves were forcibly removed in a brawl OR intentionally for some sort of 'fashion statement' of the Good-Ole-Boy-Lookee-Me-Guns type) and, not so oddly enough, cut-off denim shorts (could it be that this attire is from an Adult Garanimals line of clothing I am completely unaware of--like he matched his Monkeys this morning-- or did/does this fellow have a phobia about having his extremities covered?)
Astride the hood of a late model Chevy Celebrity (red 4-door) in a manner that some might (and I will) call Lascivious
Beside him rested three peeled bananas (yes, Peeled AND actually ON the hood of the car and not, say, a napkin or maybe even one of his discared sleeves) each of which were pointing in three of the four Cardinal Directions (North, South, and West)
I took all of this in while entering the Gas Station/Superette to fetch my morning coffee. While checking out I noted that the shop was having a 3 Bananas for a Dollar Special (a 'deal' I did not partake in unlike the aforementioned gentleman obviously). I was in and out within 5 or so minutes and the guy was STILL sitting on the hood of his car and had not yet made any move towards his (I'm guessing) breakfast.
He was still there when I left; as motionless as the bared fruit upon his car's bonnet.
Was the banana placement a strange offering to the Urban Gods of Produce?
Considering his Lecherous posturing, perhaps some cryptic reference to his barely swaddled wing-ding?
Was he warming the bananas via a combination of the morning Sun and the ambient heat emitted from his engine block?
If anyone wants to speculate on what the hell this was all about I am all ears...hell--speaking of ears-- maybe I'll even shuck some corn tomorrow morning and follow this guy's lead.
T
Middle-aged caucasian gentleman (bristley pate with the slightest sheen of sweat and/or morning dew)
Sleeveless Flannel shirt (appeared to not have been purchased that way...strong possibility that the former sleeves were forcibly removed in a brawl OR intentionally for some sort of 'fashion statement' of the Good-Ole-Boy-Lookee-Me-Guns type) and, not so oddly enough, cut-off denim shorts (could it be that this attire is from an Adult Garanimals line of clothing I am completely unaware of--like he matched his Monkeys this morning-- or did/does this fellow have a phobia about having his extremities covered?)
Astride the hood of a late model Chevy Celebrity (red 4-door) in a manner that some might (and I will) call Lascivious
Beside him rested three peeled bananas (yes, Peeled AND actually ON the hood of the car and not, say, a napkin or maybe even one of his discared sleeves) each of which were pointing in three of the four Cardinal Directions (North, South, and West)
I took all of this in while entering the Gas Station/Superette to fetch my morning coffee. While checking out I noted that the shop was having a 3 Bananas for a Dollar Special (a 'deal' I did not partake in unlike the aforementioned gentleman obviously). I was in and out within 5 or so minutes and the guy was STILL sitting on the hood of his car and had not yet made any move towards his (I'm guessing) breakfast.
He was still there when I left; as motionless as the bared fruit upon his car's bonnet.
Was the banana placement a strange offering to the Urban Gods of Produce?
Considering his Lecherous posturing, perhaps some cryptic reference to his barely swaddled wing-ding?
Was he warming the bananas via a combination of the morning Sun and the ambient heat emitted from his engine block?
If anyone wants to speculate on what the hell this was all about I am all ears...hell--speaking of ears-- maybe I'll even shuck some corn tomorrow morning and follow this guy's lead.
T
posted by Tony at 5:05 PM
1 Comments:
You have really great taste on catch article titles, even when you are not interested in this topic you push to read it
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