Some Pet Peeves of mine:

Soup as the main course at the 'soup kitchen'...can't a man get a hoagie on occasion? I get it that it's called a SOUP kitchen...but I can see that there some other goodies in the back that I suspect that you're hording.

UPS delivery folk with issues...is it really necessary to take my pulse before handing over the package?

Adults with sock puppets at buffet-style restaurants....why? Why must you talk to the sneeze guard?
Get yer damn chicken-fried steak and taters and move on!!!

Teenagers with tiny heads and low-fitting ballcaps...you *do* know that your lids make your domes comical, yes?

Inappropriate tattoos...Facial tats exclaiming superiority over all primates may *not* be what we want to see (although the scimatar-image is a nice touch)

People with oxygen tanks on wheels...OH! Aren't *you* fancy! Mister I-can-pay-for-High-Grade-Air while the rest of us are stuck sucking old-fashioned wind.

Over-zealous Shoe Store employees...do you really think I don't know my god damn shoe size? How about if I measure my tootsies in your ass?

My crazy neighbor, 'Shirtless Darryl'...I am not interested in hearing about your job at the airline again(as a baggage handler; which actually concerns me a great deal, come to think of it), quit leering at the 'boss' when she's gardening, and close your god damn drapes when you shower!!!


That's just for starters...
T