I Need a (dozen) Towel(s) so the Boy(s) can take a Shower
slightly amended bit from Frank Zappa's DONG WORK FOR YUDA


Scene: The Zappa Plays Zappa show at First Avenue on June 6th, 2008

Participants: Tour Related Paraphelnia Salesperson and yours truly


Me: Hey, wow! A Frank Zappa wall tapestry! That's pretty sweet. How much is that?

Salesperson: Uhm, no, that's actually a Frank Zappa beach towel.

Me: What? That's a bit odd considering he was a studio rat and all. A beach towel? It'd be cooler if it was a wall tapestry or a faux Shroud of Turin with a Frank slant in lieu of JC, y'know?

S: Er. Uh. Well, Mister Zappa DID live in California and, if you're familiar with its geography, it has a lot of beaches. Ergo, beach towel.

Me: Oh, hell. Using that logic I could justify selling Official Joe Cocker canned hams at his concerts by telling folk he spent the better part of 1967 sleeping in a pig sty on a swine skin cot.

S: ...

Me: I'll take the beach towel...but I'm calling it a tapestry and hanging it on the wall.

S: Whatever.



and just for Porcinely Laughs: