TIP, Old Folks and NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN
with one fat man thrown in for fun

Saw NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN.

Wowza.

I'm of the mind that this was a great film...and I'd probably KNOW THIS for a fact if it hadn't been for the elderly couple that decided to sit RIGHT NEXT TO ME at the theater. The Old Man (of this Doddering Duo) almost inserted my Medium Soda into his asshole when attempting to lower his frame into the seat to my immediate left. My (previously unknown) Coke Fu abilities saved said beverage from being trasmorgrified into a Theater Colonic at the very last second.

Then the previews started.

Now, I'm no fan of the TEN OR MORE PREVIEWS thing myself...but I'm also not asking my nearly blind wife to look at my watch to tell me how long they've been going on in a darkened theater after three of them (from my vantage point the watch in question could have easily been a wrist-sized sundial for all the luck they were having trying to tell the time off of it in, as I've noted, a darkened theaters). It was at THAT point that I was going to move. Unfortunately, this hopeful relocation was nixed by the theater being completely full.

Then the film began.

A heavy smattering of your steroetypical Old Folk Movie (Loud) Ponderings:

"What's going on?"

"What is he doing?"

"How long IS this picture?"

"What's that tube thing?"

And so on.

Coupled with MY FAVORITE Bit.

Everytime the actor Javier Bardem (Anton Chigurh) appeared on the screen...Every. Single. TIME. The Female of this Codgery Couple would go:

*sharp intake of air*
(no Oxygen Tank accompanied her)
*release of air*

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

Delightful.

Perfectly delightful.

Another bit that was a ton of fun:

The Elderly Male would say (Loud Slur, natch) NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN whenever Tommy Lee Jones appeared on the screen.

So I am trapped. I can either leave or try to make due.

I stayed.

We get to the end parts. Lots of oratory. No they are REALLY going to town on the Mutterings. I'm done with it. I tell them both--looking directly at them--to PLEASE COULD YOU BOTH SHUT UP and I'm completely and utterly disregarded. They do not even turn to look at me. I am not there. They are entitled. They have been tax payers for Generations. They can do whatever they want. I clearly have no respect for the Elderly.

So.

A seemingly Really Really good film that I will need to go see again...but this time I am NOT going in the middle of the afternoon on a Sunday.

T
(Addendum: The bastard sitting behind me with his large popcorn. Apparently his Food-Fetching-Fist was larger than the bag holding his Nutrients as it was mashing and crinkling for the first 45 minutes of the film)