I Fret about your Salve

He's the kinda fellow that likes to keep, what would be considered in other less informed walks of life, an overly moist bango. Even modified a portable humidor to double as its case.

It gets worse; it has a spit valve. I'm not sure what he's using to keep it in said soaky state nor, obviously, what is seeping out when he 'uncorks' it...yes, the spit valve is actually a cork that he swiped from a Jug Band performer (he got backstage somehow--I suspect posing as a groupie and the promise of a grip-squip--and pinched a fist full of 'em...among other things...kaff).

Moist but not TOO moist I'd guess due to the presence of a means by which to ease up on its...er...dewy-ness.

That's one slicked up instrument.

Can't fault a man for this certain proclivity.

Heck...he's always been a bit off...he saw a guy with a tracheotomy and asked how much it cost his parents to have him cross-bred with a dolphin; he wanted a blowhole himself so that he could double as a wind instrument...like a jug or some sort of obscene living one-holed fife (we're going to refrain from noting his other Natural orifices).