Thir-Team Meeting Part One

Look, you know how I feel about the guy. I mean...after the 'Incident' he was nice enough to offer to lop off his own leg and GIVE IT TO ME so I could continue to compete. He didn't even care that medical science was not advanced enough to successfully graft an entire leg to another person and have it work properly (not to mention the fact that, even if it had been possible, that I would have been woefully lop-sided--as I have about a foot *heh* on this charitable lout--and would have required a modified ice-skate to even me out on the rink. Fortunately I wasn't as injured as originally thought and he still has both his own pegs to totter about on...and considering his nickname that's a lot of tottering. It's the thought that counts, really. How many people do you know that have offered extremities to you to replace your own injured/maimed/missing ones? Word has it that he was in the process of Priority Mailing one of his own peepers (the non-lazy one) to Peter Falk before ol' Columbo's lawyers stopped the procedure from going forward. Astounding really...I mean...he was okay with the notion of an eyepatch...even rabidly so...something about a Pirate-Fixation...or maybe a James Joyce fanaticism...I dunno. But an empty ocular socket didn't even phase him. Hell, he probably would have suggested handing over his own head to the bean-less torso of John the Baptist himself if someone...maybe Jesus or some other miracleworker...would have been capable of fusing it to the unoccupied neck-hole. These failed 'donations'--real or imagined--alone speak volumes for the fellow and I vote YEA to electing him to our little Cabal. I'm even overlooking the fact that he did suggest at one time that I should have my teeth filed down to lessen my, as he put it, 'Equine Grimace.' T