Your Tableware Inspires!

I'd rather be a covert plate manipulator. Slightly tweaking the placement of dishware in a manner most secretive...like fine tuning an old radio with a feather duster or, more likely, reroute my overwhelmingly powerful mental spoon-bending abilities to another section of your pantry. Imagine THEN thine mastication of tubers! Or Country Fried Steak! Or a Grouse stuffed with Doo Dads! Gustatory enjoyment explosions 'bout the surface of your overly moistened Stamp Licking Organ--like Fireworks going off inside the Hormel Plant--and all thanks to clandestine plate pleasuring (for they do enjoy the ways in which I shift their positions...they've said as much).